Newfie

Years ago I was on a business trip in north central Ontario as the expert of a certain piece of capital equipment. The customer was having problems, not satisfied with our field service, and so asked for the 'expert engineer'. That was me. Anyway, I explained and proved that the machine was performing as it was designed, and that their upstream system was the issue. During the conversation I suggested they consider doing what their sister plant in Newfoundland did. Later I learned that I insulted those guys in the Ontario plant.

This little story is why I thought about the above. Via e-mail.

Each Friday night after work, sun, snow or rain, Jack, being a Newfie, would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a moose steak. But, all of Jack's neighbours were Catholic. And since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled moose steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest.

The priest came to visit Jack, and suggested that he become a Catholic. After several classes and much study, Jack attended Mass, and as the priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said: "You were born a Protestant and raised a Protestant, but now you are a Catholic."

Jack's neighbours were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived, and the wonderful aroma of grilled moose filled the neighbourhood. The priest was called immediately by the neighbours, and, as he rushed into Jack's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement. There stood Jack, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat and chanted: "You wuz born a moose, you wuz raised a moose, but now you is a codfish."